he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
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