We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
