So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
