Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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