And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
she pinky promised me she was 18
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Randomize