eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
Randomize