it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
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