He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
