Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(713): View more from Texas

Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.

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(973): View more from New Jersey

Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie

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(612): View more from Minnesota

Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.

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(214): View more from Texas

I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(408): View more from California

Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.

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(734): View more from Michigan

Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20

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(239): View more from Florida

And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok

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(609): View more from New Jersey

I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.

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(209): View more from California

She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper

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