btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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