you guys were way drunker than both of me
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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