as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
