Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
