I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize
