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• (804): View more from Virginia

  id be glad to

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• (347): View more from New York

  Need sex. Gaining weight.

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• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.

  (614): View more from Ohio

  Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

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• (805): View more from California

  i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !

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• (207): View more from Maine

  I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.

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• (281): View more from Texas

  Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.

  (940): View more from Texas

  Deal.

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto

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  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

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• (712): View more from Iowa

  You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.

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• (954): View more from Florida

  I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!

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• (586): View more from Michigan

  Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.

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• (971): View more from Oregon

  It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food

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• (859): View more from Kentucky

  Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop

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