Texts From Last Night

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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior

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  (608): Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior http://tfl.nu/44hw
  Replies (6) Good night (3905) Bad night (736)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.

  (1-314): View more from Missouri

  Man I wish I had been there

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.

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  (314): Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours. (1-314): Man I wish I had been there (314): Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again. http://tfl.nu/g53a
  Replies (11) Good night (2730) Bad night (607)
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  (972): View more from Texas

  it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles

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  (972): it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles http://tfl.nu/ysqd
  Replies (26) Good night (1137) Bad night (5174)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time

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  (770): Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time http://tfl.nu/rffr
  Replies (21) Good night (5798) Bad night (1269)
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  (310): View more from California

  He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.

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  (310): He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance. http://tfl.nu/gr0i
  Replies (25) Good night (9253) Bad night (789)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.

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  (207): I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee. http://tfl.nu/4bjn
  Replies (18) Good night (4770) Bad night (1168)
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  (889): View more from

  found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.

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  (889): found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint. http://tfl.nu/70ee
  Replies (3) Good night (2594) Bad night (1199)
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  (660): View more from Missouri

  It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.

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  (660): It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope. http://tfl.nu/g3x7
  Replies (7) Good night (1183) Bad night (777)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?

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  (732): A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me? http://tfl.nu/nk2r
  Replies (11) Good night (2499) Bad night (696)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  And by one day I mean once every two weeks.

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  (604): If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob. (604): And by one day I mean once every two weeks. http://tfl.nu/w0wa
  Replies (14) Good night (3005) Bad night (655)
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.

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  (312): You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on. http://tfl.nu/wd3p
  Replies (5) Good night (1138) Bad night (329)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now

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  (609): I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now http://tfl.nu/txwa
  Replies (5) Good night (529) Bad night (250)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.

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  (770): Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else. http://tfl.nu/0so2
  Replies (1) Good night (303) Bad night (539)
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  (386): View more from Florida

  When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".

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  (386): When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me". http://tfl.nu/x44y
  Replies (0) Good night (649) Bad night (203)
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  (518): View more from New York

  So do you know how we found out he was engaged?

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  An Amber Alert?

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  (518): So do you know how we found out he was engaged? (704): An Amber Alert? http://tfl.nu/r4bm
  Replies (4) Good night (469) Bad night (266)

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