Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Randomize