Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
