the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Randomize
