I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
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