saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
