**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
