butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Define "chronic" masturbator.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize