Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
