woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
