I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
