He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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