is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
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