my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
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