He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
