He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
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