You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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