I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Randomize
