ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Randomize
