We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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