idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Randomize
