You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Randomize
