Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
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they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
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when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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