In the future we'll all be gay
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This baby is an asshole
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
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