I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Thanks for jumping on that grenade for me last night. You're the best wingman ever
She ate 7 of the 8 slices of pizza. I deserve a purple heart and sex w your sister
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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