dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Randomize