Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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