I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
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