Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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