How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I think I am morally bankrupt
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
