A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
