i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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