just tell him i said nine months
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
