your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Even the bartender felt bad for me
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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