I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
