we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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