Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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