i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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